Coming Unglued: Trapped in the Car without Air!

"Oh my God! Turn on the air vents or I am getting out!"

Yeah, I screamed that to my partner as we were leaving home. Yeah, I did open the door and try to get out of a moving vehicle. Yes, I forgot my seat belt was on. Yes, it was embarrassing...

I have a problem when I am in an area that has no air movement. So, I guess that isn't normal, huh? Well that is what I have been told. For most people that is merely uncomfortable, for a number of people it is what they prefer. For me it is a one way ticket to crazy town. 

Here is the problem. Other people are not aware of the rules of your space and sometimes we aren't either until that panic attack starts to claw its way out of your chest. Often we work with assumption about how thing are supposed to work and we don't fill in those people around us. Sometimes those assumptions or rules are so subconscious for us we don't know how to express them and when they rear their ugly head we are in the grips of fear and can't express them in a positive or constructive way.

Moments like this may happen for you and here is what I am trying to do and I hope it helps:

1. Focus on breathing, keeping your breath under control with careful breathing will occupy some of your attention leaving less of your attention focused on the offending action.
2. Stay calm while addressing others. Other people do not know what is going on in your head and are not aware you are about to freak out and being rude won't get them on your side.  They don't know that by taking their pet rat named Gregory out of its cage that they have just unleashed your worst fear. As long as they aren't being mean and are honestly ignorant of what they have done then they deserve the respect of being addressed civilly.
3. Try to express your fear to whomever is causing it. For me, the problem in the car was apparent from the moment I sat down, I just chose to ignore it rather than "be a bother" to those around me. The problem is that the anxiety kept ramping up, unaddressed, until I came unglued and then I definitely WAS a bother. Asking to have the vent on is not an unreasonable thing and can be easily accommodated. In the situation with the rat Gregory you should speak up immediately once you see it in the cage. "I am terrified of rats, please, can it stay in the cage?" Most people will understand.
4. If 1 through 3 aren't doable, remove yourself until they are. Try removing yourself from the situation if it is safe. If your friend doesn't realize that picking up poor little Gregory is a trigger for you and you can't handle explaining it to him in the moment then leave, regain composure and try talking to your friend away from the trigger so you can explain calmly. 

Make sure the anxiety triggers you are dealing with can be reasonably accommodated. If seeing the color mauve freaks your freak you may want to seek help because asking the world to give that color up is unreasonable. You need to find a way to cope with things as they are. If the crowded line at the grocery store is pushing all your panic buttons and you need a moment to get composure, go for it. If you are afraid of dogs and you are going to a dog owner/lovers house let them know ahead of time and ask if you can just meet there and spend the evening out at a restaurant instead of with Fido. However, asking them to put the pooch away for the whole evening while you stay in and watch movies isn't going to go over well. Make sure you are reasonable and people will meet you half way.